Before I venture into today's topic. I'd just want to tell y'all what happened last week when I was back in Melaka. So yeah I went back to Melaka happily blablabla spent quality time with my family and all. Here are some pictures.
Everything was going so well until the morning I was going back to Subang. Tough luck for me I shall say. I woke up with immense pain coming from my stomach. At first I thought it was just a normal stomachache and it would go away after I shat. So, yeah I went to shit LOLOL but it was still throbbing. God damn it. And WORST OF ALL I couldn't freaking eat anything T_____T
Haih. Then my mom gave me the Feng Sha Wan pills to eat (look like fcking cockroach eggs okay). I was still in pain and had no energy. So she asked me to drink Revive. Bad, bad idea. About an hour later, I ended up puking the cockroach eggs out, with a taste of Revive =_____= And you wonder how I knew it were the pills? THEY WERE STILL INTACT AND WHOLE. No sign of it being digested whatsoever. Wtf man. These 2 combi ah, fcking disgusting okay. The aftertaste is just urgh. Nabeh. I felt much better after puking though.
I thought I was okay (again lol), but I was wrong. I ate a few mouths of Mom's fried rice, and went to sleep. And because I puked and laosai, and didn't eat much, I woke up feeling so damn weak. It was so torturing lah wtf. Then I had to go take Shu Yie's dad's traditional shirt (for PM presentation) from his mom at Tesco. I guess this is the torturing part lol. Ok so by that time, my body has already been super weak. I walked from the car park to the entrance already felt like dying. -____- Had to pit stop at a coffee shop halfway WTF. I got the shirt and went to Melaka Sentral. Mommy bought a chocolate donut for me and we sat at a mamak stall and drank Teh O panas. Thank God for all these, gave me a bit of energy to last till the bus arrived.
Oh yeah. I met Kitchen on the way to the platform (apparently I went the opposite way wtf I acted cool when he corrected me HAHAHAHA). Then I saw Hwee San too!! They (Jia Ying too) were all going back to UCSI. I thought we were gonna be on the same bus aiya. It's okay. Next time.
Then we re-met again at TBS! Had short chats along the way to the taxis. Their taxi fare is bloody cheap. RM5 per taxi back to UCSI because it's so near. *jealous* ours is like...lolll. No wonder they could go back every week!!!! It was a nice short meetup. We'll go back together next time okay?? Maybe this time with Ms Chong Phui Zee too hahahaha.
I don't know if I should say I am lucky or not lol????? Because after dinner and showering I felt so much better. But the next day I had MA2 PT1 lol fml.
Which brings me to my topic (jialat now only go into topic). By "not giving a damn" I don't mean to ask people to give up on life and sell drugs by the roadside lol.
I know, people tend to compare with others no matter what. Seriously. Competing and comparing are really unhealthy. Okay, you may argue that it's good because you want to be better and all. Yes, I agree. But comparing yourself so constantly with other people may drive you insane. It may drive you to depression too. For MA2, I only managed to score 56 while the highest was 90. Yes, I scored very very low. If I were the old me in secondary school, I would cry my heart out and be emo for the whole day.
Surprisingly though, this time, I didn't feel depressed of my result. I was neutral about it. Then only I realized that I'd stopped comparing. I didn't give a damn about other people's results. I know I did my best despite having not studied very thoroughly the day before. This is what I deserve and I expected this result. And it was just PT, after all. Though honestly if this were finals I'd cry the shit outta myself lol.
But really. If you stop comparing, you'd live a much happier life! You'd feel carefree, and unburdened by people's judgmental thinking about me. "The lesser you give a damn, the happier you will be." True that. You won't feel your world crumbling, you won't feel helpless, you won't feel that you're the dumbest person on Earth.
I just felt incredibly lucky I didn't get stomachache in the middle of the test hahahahahha. It's a lie to say I didn't care. I did. But I didn't let it push me to the edge of depression. I am still worried about this subject. I just wish that I can push myself harder to obtain better results in Mock and Finals. For Mock, I'd just want to maintain my PT2 results. Let's hope it will come true after my efforts.
Everything was going so well until the morning I was going back to Subang. Tough luck for me I shall say. I woke up with immense pain coming from my stomach. At first I thought it was just a normal stomachache and it would go away after I shat. So, yeah I went to shit LOLOL but it was still throbbing. God damn it. And WORST OF ALL I couldn't freaking eat anything T_____T
Haih. Then my mom gave me the Feng Sha Wan pills to eat (look like fcking cockroach eggs okay). I was still in pain and had no energy. So she asked me to drink Revive. Bad, bad idea. About an hour later, I ended up puking the cockroach eggs out, with a taste of Revive =_____= And you wonder how I knew it were the pills? THEY WERE STILL INTACT AND WHOLE. No sign of it being digested whatsoever. Wtf man. These 2 combi ah, fcking disgusting okay. The aftertaste is just urgh. Nabeh. I felt much better after puking though.
I thought I was okay (again lol), but I was wrong. I ate a few mouths of Mom's fried rice, and went to sleep. And because I puked and laosai, and didn't eat much, I woke up feeling so damn weak. It was so torturing lah wtf. Then I had to go take Shu Yie's dad's traditional shirt (for PM presentation) from his mom at Tesco. I guess this is the torturing part lol. Ok so by that time, my body has already been super weak. I walked from the car park to the entrance already felt like dying. -____- Had to pit stop at a coffee shop halfway WTF. I got the shirt and went to Melaka Sentral. Mommy bought a chocolate donut for me and we sat at a mamak stall and drank Teh O panas. Thank God for all these, gave me a bit of energy to last till the bus arrived.
Oh yeah. I met Kitchen on the way to the platform (apparently I went the opposite way wtf I acted cool when he corrected me HAHAHAHA). Then I saw Hwee San too!! They (Jia Ying too) were all going back to UCSI. I thought we were gonna be on the same bus aiya. It's okay. Next time.
Then we re-met again at TBS! Had short chats along the way to the taxis. Their taxi fare is bloody cheap. RM5 per taxi back to UCSI because it's so near. *jealous* ours is like...lolll. No wonder they could go back every week!!!! It was a nice short meetup. We'll go back together next time okay?? Maybe this time with Ms Chong Phui Zee too hahahaha.
I don't know if I should say I am lucky or not lol????? Because after dinner and showering I felt so much better. But the next day I had MA2 PT1 lol fml.
Which brings me to my topic (jialat now only go into topic). By "not giving a damn" I don't mean to ask people to give up on life and sell drugs by the roadside lol.
I know, people tend to compare with others no matter what. Seriously. Competing and comparing are really unhealthy. Okay, you may argue that it's good because you want to be better and all. Yes, I agree. But comparing yourself so constantly with other people may drive you insane. It may drive you to depression too. For MA2, I only managed to score 56 while the highest was 90. Yes, I scored very very low. If I were the old me in secondary school, I would cry my heart out and be emo for the whole day.
Surprisingly though, this time, I didn't feel depressed of my result. I was neutral about it. Then only I realized that I'd stopped comparing. I didn't give a damn about other people's results. I know I did my best despite having not studied very thoroughly the day before. This is what I deserve and I expected this result. And it was just PT, after all. Though honestly if this were finals I'd cry the shit outta myself lol.
But really. If you stop comparing, you'd live a much happier life! You'd feel carefree, and unburdened by people's judgmental thinking about me. "The lesser you give a damn, the happier you will be." True that. You won't feel your world crumbling, you won't feel helpless, you won't feel that you're the dumbest person on Earth.
I just felt incredibly lucky I didn't get stomachache in the middle of the test hahahahahha. It's a lie to say I didn't care. I did. But I didn't let it push me to the edge of depression. I am still worried about this subject. I just wish that I can push myself harder to obtain better results in Mock and Finals. For Mock, I'd just want to maintain my PT2 results. Let's hope it will come true after my efforts.
x
Celine
Because I just want to be the best for you.
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