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Chapter 267: What Defines You

Hey sorry for the super long hiatus. I got back to college recently. The timetable's a bit more packed now though there are no morning classes for Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday (Super grateful for that haha). I'm fine, handling the homesickness pretty well I guess. I won't be back to Melaka till the Raya holidays. which starts on the 25th. YES 14 more days till I'm back baby. Totally can't wait to breathe in Melaka air again *anxious*

I attended my first Moral Ed lecture yesterday. Guess what? My lecturer has the same name as me. LOL. The second her name appeared on the slide (she was using powerpoint to introduce the subject), I immediately exclaimed "What the fuck" lol. Then everyone around me was like "Eh Celine Tan leh" -___-

At first I was pretty annoyed lah. Like, why do so many people have the same name as me? Get your own name lah lol. I wouldn't say my name is common actually. Until I knew there was another Celine Tan who is 2 years younger than me in school. And when I hear people say they know like 5 Celines I'm like -____- seriously ah?

Then just now Qing asked me my chinese name then she said "Wah there are a lot of Li Wen around leh.". Kevin said it's common too. And he also said that both my names (eng and chi) are common. LOL. To be honest, those comments were kinda hurtful lah. I always thought that my name was special and one of a kind ;A; Heh, kinda broke my heart knowing I was just "one of those people" with common names. *Okay*

However, I realized that it isn't even my fault to have a common name in the first place. Heck, I can't even blame my parents for it. They have their reasons and I respect them for that. The main reason why we even have names is because you can't go calling people "Eh" or "Wei" all their lives lol. Our names don't define us. WE define ourselves.

Imagine if we live in a world where people are defined by their names.

"Oh my God his name is John. He must be a nerdy guy with ugly freckles!"

"She's a JESSICA. Confirm chiobu."

"Eh he's Alvin, the voice sure sound like chipmunk."

See? Then again, we ALWAYS define people by their names before we even get to know them.

It's our own personality that defines us. It's how we behave around people, how we acknowledge people. It's our attitude towards different matters that defines us. It's the things we love, the things we do, and our thoughts. It's the way we talk, the way we laugh, the way we cry. It's the books we read, the way we write, the way we see things.

Maybe you don't like your name. Maybe you blame your parents for giving you a bad name. But hey, they're not the one who is responsible for living your life. They just merely gave you a head start to your life by providing you a name because you were too young to decide for yourself. YOU are the one responsible for making that name big, for making yourself special. What for you have a super cool name but your life is shitty as hell. Got use meh?

And it's not what people define you that matters the most, it's what YOU decide to define yourself. Live for yourself. Fuck what others think. You do what you want and be happy.




Confession: I always feel so much better after saying "Fuck it" to everything.



x
Celine



Just another gentle reminder to myself.

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